Happiness with Emotional maturity
Many call it Emotional Intelligence, but when it comes to dealing with people around us, emotions play a key role in how people see us. Good and timely emotions can make us look more attractive and a pleasant personality to deal with, however a mistimed or a bad emotion can do just the reverse. This holds true in all scenarios from our families, friends to right inside our offices.
A person whom I knew from my childhood has probably not graced success in all the areas he ventured in. His investments gave him less returns, his business was giving him negative returns most of the time, his friends only see him as unpredictable and his family barely tolerates him. It so happened that one of his spiritual gurus explained to him the reason of his failure by blaming the stars, but craftily giving a strong recommendation that he should take a back seat and follow what his wife says. Even his businesses should be managed by her.
“ Creating the right balance is a must for a happy life “
Being God fearing, he ensured complete compliance. For a few months, his wife found it difficult, but very soon, things started coming back to normal. She managed the business better, where staff worked hard, customers had better trust and in a couple of years, things started getting back to normal. The exceptions of this man throwing tantrums and making things difficult for his wife were effectively handled by the spiritual guru who made part of the profits by confining this man to do more spiritual work instead of meddling with things already being done well.
On one of my meetings, the lady was candid enough to tell me that the only reason why nothing worked was the inability of her husband to control his emotional urges which pushed him to take decisions which bounced, causing distress to everyone involved.
Such people and their negative emotional life exist at every level in our society and they are the reason we have riots, terror attacks, extremism, split families, stress and the list can go on. Such people and societies fail to understand the outcome of their decisions and actions and continue to suffer and impact people around them, when it can be not only avoided but also reversed into happiness all around.
You can be a great family man, great boss and a superb friend if you take a few tips in your emotional balance seriously.
a. See a mirror whenever we feel good or bad about anything. Our face and its expression which gets multiplied quickly reflects the outcome of the emotion we are undergoing. If you are seen smiling by others, they too relax and smile with you. If you frown, do not expect others to return back their smiles.
b. Life is a perfect checksum game. What you give, sooner or later you get back the same. If you spread happiness, you get back in return and that holds true for your wrong actions too. It is extremely important for you to think before you act. Some decisions may not be right if taken in spur of the moment. Give yourself time to rethink before you take such decisions.
c. Engage yourself productively. Only those who have a lot of time and unused talent end up doing things which is designed to attract attention. While some actions may be positive, we have seen mostly negative actions out of such lack of engagement. Jobless youths turn to crime, bored housewife triggers fights, retired old people get sick quickly and unattended kids are usually naughtier. Seek some useful engagement irrespective of the fact that it gives any money in return or not and ensure your vacant time is spent well.
d. Disengage yourself from overdoing anything. Creating the right balance is a must for a happy life. Working too hard, going to extremes to get what one desires may work some times, but has its own collateral damages. Take time out to relax and find the good things in life and people around. Listening to music, playing some game you like, taking a vacation, spending quality time with your family and friends are few such things you should practice.
e. Take care of your health. Your physical health has a great bearing on your mental health from where these emotions originate. Ensure some time for your body and mind which gives you the very life you are working for, till your last day on this planet.
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